Monday, September 28, 2015

Not Forgetting to Remember

It was still another message on the phone, asking my spouse and me to do something related to the care my spouse and I help to provide for both an elderly and a disabled relative, and my mind wanted to go "pop".  So, I forced myself to step back.

Sometimes, there are just not enough hours in the day for most of us.  But then, there are also flashes of seeing another side of life, a side where we who give care depend on the kindness or effort of others, and sometimes we just don't pay them enough thanks.

Sometimes, we are so harried and forgetful, and we forget to see past ourselves, our own problems, and realize what we have been granted - friendship, support, and kindness.

Today, I want to say "thank you" to some of the people in our lives we could not have made it through the past months without:

The cousin who, seeing how we were struggling with a last minute deadline, switched with someone else at his job, and came by at 7:30 the next morning, with his patient and strong son in tow, to help us out.  We never could have met a deadline without this act of kindness.

My mother in law's neighbor, who has been more of a help than we can ever thank her.

My son.  Your grandmother appreciates everything you did.

The co-workers who gave me support, and listened to a rant or two (or three, or....I'm not saying how many.)

A couple of in laws and their spouses or significant others, and other relatives, for what they did to help us.  It's too long a list to publish.

My spouse, who puts up with my impatient and emotional nature.

A geriatric care manager, who gave us more support than she will ever know.

Staff of a certain ARC chapter, for their years of service to my brother in law "B", who has autism.

Various medical people.  The nurses who do the work and tend to be forgotten, especially.

I know I have missed people in this list.  If I missed you,know that I still appreciated you.

And finally, you, my readers, during this time of me not commenting on their comments, not reading their blogs, being somewhat self-centered at times.  They forgive me for rerunning posts of the past from time to time (to time).  This situation will probably exist for at a while longer, and I appreciate your patience.

Have you ever depended on the support of others?


  1. Hi,

    I can't tell you how often others have helped me through a rough patch, and reading your blog post reminded me how often I need to say thanks, but never took the time to do so.

    Yes, I have to make it a point to thank people, friends, family members, and readers for helping me through some rough times.

    Either I've suffered from mental anxiety as a result of my daughter's addiction or the spouse isn't paying attention to what I say to him to anything else business-related. It all adds up, eventually, and makes life hard to handle.

    If not for the people in my life that exist outside of my home, my mind would be mush!

    Thank you for bringing this realization to the forefront of my mind. I appreciate you!

    - Bonnie

    1. It's rough when a person has to deal with issues such as the ones you are facing. I'll be thinking of you, too.

  2. Even though I really try to do this regularly, it is good to have a slight kick to remind us how important this is -- thank you

    1. We all need that reminder from time to time.

  3. Sometimes you're in a position to help, sometimes you need the help. Glad to hear you've gotten the help you've needed.

    1. We've been most fortunate. Some of the help we received was a result of kindneses my mother in law had shown to people in her life, and we are grateful for that.

  4. It takes a village and it sounds like you have a good and functioning "village" in place.

    1. Some of these people were friends/neighbors/relatives of my mother in law, helping her out in her time of need by helping us. Sometimes, kindnesses shown really are returned when you least expect it.

  5. Your admission brought tears to my eyes. I don't have many people to thank, and I envy you in having so much help when you needed it. But, the reverse applies: I don't help anyone else either. Never see them, and have no contact with my family. It's a two-edged sword.

    You're such a caring person. How wonderful that you are able to see past your tremendous burden and appreciate the help given by others. What you are doing must be rewarded--if not now, then in another plane of existence. I'm proud to have you as a friend in the clouds.

    Go on doing what you're doing in the knowledge that you set a shining example to us all.

    1. Oh, Francene, I'm no saint. I get so impatient with my mother in law sometimes; it is my husband who shows so much patience with both me (I tend to the emotional) and his mother. But my mother in law was kind to many people and we are reaping some of the rewards for that, as we strive to help her out. And, I hope that someone will help me whenever my hour of need arrives.


Your comments sustain me, as long as they are civil, are on topic, and do not contain profanity, advertising of any kind, links or spam. Any messages not meeting these criteria will immediately be composted, and my flowers will enjoy their contents.