When I think of the possibility of reincarnation, one of the things I dread going through once again is my teen years. Or, well, the teen years of the person I come back as.
Maybe "dread" is the wrong word, but if I come back again and have to go through the teen years, I hope they will be....different. In a good way.
Growing up is hard to do. I think it's getting harder and harder. It's harder now than when my son was growing up.
True, I grew up in the 50's and 60's, which we sometimes look back at with nostalgia, but the surface truths of those years held deep, dark, nasty secrets. And the Vietnam War overshadowed the happiness of some of those years.
Then, there are high school reunions, where we are asked to relive some of those years.
After reading my recent post on my spouse's 40th high school reunion (the only reunion either one of us has ever attended) I found I'm not the only one who has stayed away from them. One might say I hit a nerve.
Why do we get so nostalgic about high school? Is it because of friends we have lost touch with, friends we hope to reconnect with? Or because we want to return to a time when things were simpler and we were younger? Except, things were never simpler back when, whatever back when is for you.
It certainly isn't simple now, though, in 2023.
I had signed up for my 50th high school reunion only because one of the two gatherings was going to be held at the high school I went to. It wasn't a dinner dance, but rather was a daytime event, which was going to feature speakers, demonstrations, and tours of the school (it is still in the same building but things have changed).
There was only one problem - the reunion was scheduled to be held in June of 2020. You can all guess what happened. Nothing happened. If it ever happened, I never heard of a rescheduling. I had other things to think about.
So I am trying again, this year, with an "all years" alumni day, again in June, celebrating my high school's 85th anniversary. Scheduled during the morning and early afternoon, it will feature speakers, demonstrations, and tours of the school. It will also feature opportunities to meet current students.
Meeting current students, I admit, was what interested me the most. I keep in mind that these are the students of the pandemic years, the years of active shooters drills, the years of social media bullying. They are the students who were rudely yanked from their almost spring 2020 routines and dumped into a new nightmare of remote learning, illness, and fear. Then, they returned to school in the fall of 2021, to masks, illness (when Omicron swept through the school, which I heard about through Reddit) and more fear.
I lost a high school reunion in June of 2020. They lost so much more. They were too young to have the resources to cope that someone my age has.
They persevered. But at what cost?
We'll see the outside of those students, their public faces, the faces of high academic achievement (something my high school specializes in). What we won't see is the inside.
Nor will I see how they see us - the young adults, the middle aged, the elderly. An all years reunion. I may be happy I can't read their minds, but a part of me will want to know how they will perceive the alumni like me.
Who will come to the alumni day? Will I know anyone? (Being a New York City school, my graduating class had hundreds of students. I knew a fraction of them.) Will I even be able to make my way through the school floor plan?
(I'll be happy to have a friend, and perhaps a couple of guests, just in case....)
The event is free, and I could change my mind and decide not to come after all. It will cost me some, for two nights worth of motels, just for a four hour event. Fortunately, I have other things I can do just a few miles away from the school
If I do go, it sure will be interesting. And different.
Am I ready?
Stay tuned.
...I don't enjoy looking back to my high school days, they were difficult days.
ReplyDeleteI've often wondered at the 'pull' of my high school days. I don't remember thinking 'these are the most wonderful days of my life' when they were happening, though I mostly enjoyed them. They were just something to get through.
ReplyDeleteBut now, I look back on them with this rosy filter that highlights only the good times.
I'd love to have someone organize a reunion! I'd go!
I say go! And report back!
To answer one of your questions, one of the things that teachers have noted this school year is the regression of students. They lost one year of in-person schooling, and that 2nd year was weird. They are behaviorally a year or two younger. So, I'm finding middle school behaviors in 10th graders. 7th graders still have a 5th grade mentality. But you probably won't notice that on your tour.
ReplyDeleteThat’s what I’m hearing from all my friends who are teachers
DeletePeople have lost touch with these reunions. There is usually not much to talk about. You have correctly pointed out the irony of such meetings if those did not keep in touch all these years
ReplyDeleteMy memories of high school are pretty hazy to tell you the truth.
ReplyDeleteMy 50th was also an all-years. Except only 3 folks from my year (or offical year, had I stayed) showed up.
ReplyDeleteYes, I know the feeling.