Back in January, I blogged that I have never attended one of my own high school reunions (I did go to one of my spouse's) but was going to try, finally, with an 85th anniversary all years reunion in June.
However, my record is going to remain intact.
I'm not going.
What ended up happening is a family event that conflicted and I made my decision - which was more important to me? Turns out, the answer is "family".
Back in January, I blogged the following, though, and it is still valid.
"Growing up is hard to do. I think it's getting harder and harder. It's harder now than when my son was growing up.
True, I grew up in the 50's and 60's, which we sometimes look back at with nostalgia, but the surface truths of those years held deep, dark, nasty secrets. And the Vietnam War overshadowed the happiness of some of those years.
Then, there are high school reunions, where we are asked to relive some of those years.
After reading my recent post on my spouse's 40th high school reunion (the only reunion either one of us has ever attended) I found I'm not the only one who has stayed away from them. One might say I hit a nerve.
Why do we get so nostalgic about high school? Is it because of friends we have lost touch with, friends we hope to reconnect with? Or because we want to return to a time when things were simpler and we were younger? Except, things were never simpler back when, whatever back when is for you.
It certainly isn't simple now, though, in 2023.
I had signed up for my 50th high school reunion only because one of the two gatherings was going to be held at the high school I went to. It wasn't a dinner dance, but rather was a daytime event, which was going to feature speakers, demonstrations, and tours of the school (it is still in the same building but things have changed).
There was only one problem - the reunion was scheduled to be held in June of 2020. You can all guess what happened. Nothing happened. If it ever happened, I never heard of a rescheduling. I had other things to think about.
So I am trying again, this year, with an "all years" alumni day, again in June, celebrating my high school's 85th anniversary. Scheduled during the morning and early afternoon, it will feature speakers, demonstrations, and tours of the school. It will also feature opportunities to meet current students.
Meeting current students, I admit, was what interested me the most. I keep in mind that these are the students of the pandemic years, the years of active shooters drills, the years of social media bullying. They are the students who were rudely yanked from their almost spring 2020 routines and dumped into a new nightmare of remote learning, illness, and fear. Then, they returned to school in the fall of 2021, to masks, illness (when Omicron swept through the school, which I heard about through Reddit) and more fear.
I lost a high school reunion in June of 2020. They lost so much more. They were too young to have the resources to cope that someone my age has.
They persevered. But at what cost?"
I still wonder about the students of the classes of The Pandemic Disruption.
It's interesting, the nerves that are hit when I blog about high school reunions. I am far from the only person whose high school years weren't the happiest. I'm sure I'm far from the only person who has skipped reunions, too.
Time passes. I may or may not get another opportunity. Turns out, this celebration is going to be huge for my high school, which is actually holding events in several cities (including a couple overseas!) where alumni have settled.
I wish them well.
I don't regret my decision to go to my family event instead.
...I don't attend either.
ReplyDeleteI don't think anyone really enjoys high school. I've lived my whole life in the same town I grew up in, and my sons went to the same high school I went to. No one had a wonderful high school experience, although there were moments. I've seen people who bloomed in high school attempt to keep that momentum going and stall out. I've seen people who bloomed later in life enjoy what typically are high school moments many years later.
ReplyDeleteI think good and bad times---it's just life.
I think you’re doing the right thing. Family is irreplaceable.
ReplyDeleteI attended my 10th, 20th, and 30th HS reunions. Skipped the 50th but a friend shared photos. They were very informative. In HS I seemed to have missed knowing all the juicy gossip.
ReplyDeleteI even attended my college 50th reunion, but if I hadn't established a scholarship there, I doubt I would have gone. I knew no one there.
Yeah, my high school years do not hold particularly fond memories for me either and I'm not especially interested in reliving them. I do stay in touch with my friends from that era and often have a chance to visit with them when I return to Mississippi. Most of them are still there and, interestingly, most of them are teachers. I hope they are having a positive impact on the next generation.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy your family event.
ReplyDeleteHigh school was fine for me. I haven't been to a reunion (I graduated in 1975, so the big 50 is coming up before long), and don't plan to. One, I no longer live in the area. Two, I've seen online photos of the past ones and while I went to school with some of those who attended since we were 5 years old, none were friends. I know their names, that's all. It's pretty much just the "popular" clique decades later! Nothing in common with them then, probably less now.
ReplyDeleteA family event is more meaningful.
thecontemplativecat here. My 50th was 2019, in Pittsfield, Illinois. At the time, our class was the largest yet. those boomers! I tried to greet whomever I recognized (not easy). I wanted to tell them something positive they did when we were in HS.
ReplyDeleteI envy that I would love any reunions I can find these days.
ReplyDeleteThis year, I think, we kind of got a feel for what happened to the kiddos who suffered the disruption. Every teacher felt it. There was an immaturity to the students this past school year. 7th graders acted like 5th graders. 10th graders felt more like freshmen.
ReplyDeleteAnother sub was talking about teaching the book Night (by Elie Wiesenthal) to 10th graders last year. That's the group that was in 8th grade in 2020, so they missed reading The Diary of Anne Frank. (They just finished 11th grade.) He ended up having to get them up to speed on the Holocaust.
So, in answer to that question that you only hinted at, the kiddos are behind, they've got some gaps in their education, but they're catching up. They'll be fine. As much as anything in these times.
I've never attended any of my reunions. About 20 years ago, I did go back because there was a reunion of sorts for the orchestra members to come join the current school orchestrato play at graduation the year our long-time teacher/conductor retired. That turned out to be really nice because quite a few of the people I hung out with throughout high school were there. I don't think they would go to a regular reunion, either.
ReplyDelete