Welcome to the year 2019 and to another Ultimate Blog Challenge.
A year of caregiving for a 90 year old mother in law (who passed away
on Black Friday) taught me a lot about all those things you put off, until you reach the day when you realize you have waited too long.
Learn from my mistakes.
How about conducting a year beginning review today? My spouse and I are slowly doing this.
These suggestions are just from hard won experience - I am not a financial planner, a tax professional, or a legal professional, or anyone similar to these experts. You may want to consult one or more such professionals to help you.
This is what I found and/or learned, and where I am as of today - still a long way to go.
1. Do you have a will? I do, but in consulting a lawyer during a free legal senior event last year, I found out it was sadly outdated. Ditto for spouse. ACTION NEEDED: I need to get it updated. And, oh yes, that person you named as executor? Is that your current wish? Does that person even know you've done it?
2 Health Care Proxy? DNR (do not resuscitate) order (if desired)? Anything similar available in your state?
The important thing is: Does someone know your end of life wishes? Does any document you have right now reflect your CURRENT wishes (watching what my mother in law experienced gave me some different insight into DNR, for whatever that is worth.). Do you still want the person you named (if you have a health care proxy) making those life and death decisions for you? My spouse was his mother's health care proxy and trust me, those decisions were heart-rending.
ACTION NEEDED: I need to get my documents updated. Much easier said than done, but necessary.
3. Power of Attorney? This is such an important document; I implore you to find out about it and discuss with your loved ones and a lawyer. Enough said, as I am not a lawyer.
4. Funeral arrangements: yes, it's nothing that we want to think of. But I look at everything we (and by "we", I mean my spouse and his siblings) went through with his mother, and shudder. We knew the religion she followed but didn't know her funeral wishes. By the time we realized the discussion was needed, she was retreating into dementia. As for me, I'm an only child, so no siblings to discuss with. Do I really want to burden my one child with these decisions?
ACTION NEEDED: preplan. Know how much it will cost and how I will pay for it. Unless you've done it recently, you have no idea how many decisions you have to make.
My son has implored my spouse and I not to wait, but to do this planning now. He's right.
5. Are you paying for services you no longer need? You may want to laugh, but I've kept a YMCA membership active for over four years - I used to go several times a week but stopped after a dental surgery I had in 2014 (it was complex, and it took me a while to recover - by then, I decided to stop that particular exercise program). But I never froze the membership. As a senior, I can do that now, and not pay a monthly fee. Why didn't I do that before? ACTION NEEDED: do that.
And then there was the device on our cell phone service that we haven't needed since May, when we needed a new car. We called our provider and got it deactivated. today.
Cutting the cord? We will have to think about that soon, now that my spouse has retired.
6. What about your social media presence? My mother in law was on
Facebook. Her account sits, although we do know her password (after she
was hacked, another relative helped us reset it). I am not sure what
to do next, but this is going to be part of my year beginning review.
So, as for me: I am on Facebook, Twitter (@RamblinGarden), and Pinterest. (Shameless self-promotion - see sidebar on right and follow me!) What happens to these accounts if something happens to me? ACTION NEEDED: find these things out and do something about it.
7. If you have an Apple product, does someone know your Apple ID and password? My mother in law's phone was on our plan (we paid for it and its monthly service, in fact). Fortunately, my son had set these all up. When she developed dementia, we knew her password and apple ID and were able to help her use her phone. And now, the phone can go to another family member.
But without knowing this information, her phone would have been useless to anyone, to the best of my knowledge. So, what about you? (I would be curious to know if anyone else has been through this process.)
So, to all my readers old and new, I hope you had a HAPPY NEW YEAR.
Will you do a year beginning review, or something else, to mark the new year?
Day 1 of the Ultimate Blog Challenge #blogboost